My brother refuses to get Tumblr, which is a tragedy because this is the complete fucking nonsense they have sent me today alone, and I think Tumblr would appreciate them more than I do.
Well, I hope you’re happy. The worst I can be is a disappointment, the best I can be is your problem now.
How it started
How it’s going:
THEY’RE YOUR BROTHER??!!!?!!????!!!!!!
Yes, and I cannot tell you how glad I am that they didn’t just send me that question at 8am like they would have pre-Tumblr. I used to wake up to this bullshit every day.
i think it’s fucked up that there are plants that decided they wanted to eat meat
a plant’s job is literally to just exist but the venus flytrap chose violence
what if i gently laid an uncooked steak on the soil for it to absorb
my tree biology teacher fed her calcium-deficient tree a whole-ass bbq rib bone - she stuck it in the ground near the base of the tree (after eating the meat off of it), and when she came back to collect it to show the tree biology class it was GONE
the tree had grown a root up through the center of it & out through the sides
also there’s an old story about a man who was buried beneath a tree, and when they went to exhume the body it had been completely absorbed by the tree’s roots- you could see the shape of the body in the way the roots grew, splitting up for clearly defined arms and legs. trees will absolutely eat a steak if you bury it & they need the nutrients.
so in third grade I told two of my friends I could talk to horses & made up a really dramatic backstory of how I “discovered” my powers & our teacher overheard us talking about it and told the child psychologist I was seeing for insomnia issues & the child psychologist asked me about it & I was first and foremost terrified that if I admitted to the lie, this medical professional would tell my friends I made it all up
so I doubled down and insisted I could really talk to horses. I was doing major damage control. I didn’t realize you can’t just tell psychiatric professionals you have magic powers, I was 8.
so I ended up in counseling for this for an entire year until eventually I just stopped going for some reason but when I was 20 the office contacted me to tell me the psychologist was retiring & asked if I wanted a copy of my childhood records before they were filed away and eventually shredded & I said sure & went over them & discovered that she had diagnosed me with “psychotic delusions” bc I was 8 and apparently convinced her I truly thought I could talk to horses.
genuinely cannot tell if I my parents should’ve been cashing in on me as the most sought-after child actor of the era or if that psychologist was just extremely so so so bad at her job.
I also figured out I stopped seeing her because she told my parents the diagnosis and my dad was like “she’s doesn’t think she can talk to horses!!! she’s lying to you 😭😭😭😭” but she didn’t believe him
i say i was a weird-horse-girl in elementary school and you say “me too” but did it get you a psychiatric diagnosis
ALT
ALT
